[A quiet exhale, eyes closed. Something in Hansa's words cut deeper than expected.]
I... fear it might hurt him more than he would admit, in his own way. But I also know that if necessary, he would take my life for the sake of a greater whole.
[...]
Cruel as fate is, we are well aware of what drives each other. I do not seek to change him, even though others would argue I should, and I think he has taken solace in my presence for it, even though he cannot sway me.
[They are immovable, yet in orbit, and Chiron has already made peace with that]
[Its true. Emet-Selch is ancient, immortal, and tired of the whims and petty wiles of mortal man. His world lives bu a creed of devotion to the community, and he knows he wouldn't put it past him to act to what he thinks is best for that.]
[And yet...and yet...]
I know that he can't be changed. You, too, stand as straight as an arrow. But that man...is the same man who keeps a drawing made by our son in his pockets because those ten years, though they went in the blink of an eye for someone like him, meant something.
[He lets out a huff, his anger quelling into a low simmer of exhaustion.]
You might not change his nature, or what he believes in...but damn it, Chiron. Him and I, we just lost a kid. And losing you for his sake would devastate him. Your sacrifice would be the farthest thing from something acceptable. Don't even think about that.
[He says, his expression stern. Its easy, to go forward and put yourself in the line of fire, think sacrifice is what is needed, but...]
[Especially in a world that operates like this, where even a death can throw off the entire balance of how it works. They can't afford acts like that.]
[After a moment, he reaches out, placing a hand against Chiron's side.]
And it is not that Chiron is unaware or naive; there is a weight to his presence that is often counted as necessary, especially among those who look for guidance.
... But Hansa isn't one of his students, and Chiron supposes maybe that is where his surprise comes from. His head tilts, eyes drawn to the weight of the hand on his side...]
I knew that you held me in high regard, but I did not think you...
[Hansa has always been the kind to enjoy life. Whatever it offers, big, small, the thrill of a fight, the lazy times when he can sit back and watch the news, awakening to a new day and going to bed for the night. But the life of an Executor is isolating. He's a weapon, told to go off to annihilate the Church's enemies, and though he may not remember his personal connections with the Church now, hazy as they are, he remembers that his life is one he takes on his own. Even the Quartet who goes along with him are more coworkers than friends. He knows people in the Church who he's friendly with, but its hardly as if he's out there to stay with them, just spending time for time's sake.]
[But here, free from that life, held in this bubble, there are people he's grown to care for, and more than he thought possible. He still thinks about how he would've laughed, if he was told that he would, in any way, get along with a Heroic Spirit. And here...]
[He pats Chiron's side, once, but lets it stay there, like he's afraid to draw it back.]
Yeah, well, I'm a man of many surprises. [A short laugh.] I'm always happy just...talking with you, you know?
[They have discussed it before -- how very few people took the chance to know the centaur of legend. He had spent so many years being revered for his intellect, his ability to teach. The type of fulfilling life many would covet, even if he'd always been afraid to hurt others.
But on the occasion... lonely, in its own way.
What irony that he didn't see it until coming here to the Realm, surrounded by people who have chosen to care for him on his own merits as a person.]
... I think I am more accustomed to the role of a teacher, or a warrior. [A pause... but he will reach out and place a hand on where he hopes Hansa's shoulder to be]
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no subject
No.
[A quiet exhale, eyes closed. Something in Hansa's words cut deeper than expected.]
I... fear it might hurt him more than he would admit, in his own way. But I also know that if necessary, he would take my life for the sake of a greater whole.
[...]
Cruel as fate is, we are well aware of what drives each other. I do not seek to change him, even though others would argue I should, and I think he has taken solace in my presence for it, even though he cannot sway me.
[They are immovable, yet in orbit, and Chiron has already made peace with that]
no subject
[Its true. Emet-Selch is ancient, immortal, and tired of the whims and petty wiles of mortal man. His world lives bu a creed of devotion to the community, and he knows he wouldn't put it past him to act to what he thinks is best for that.]
[And yet...and yet...]
I know that he can't be changed. You, too, stand as straight as an arrow. But that man...is the same man who keeps a drawing made by our son in his pockets because those ten years, though they went in the blink of an eye for someone like him, meant something.
[He lets out a huff, his anger quelling into a low simmer of exhaustion.]
You might not change his nature, or what he believes in...but damn it, Chiron. Him and I, we just lost a kid. And losing you for his sake would devastate him. Your sacrifice would be the farthest thing from something acceptable. Don't even think about that.
1/2
And it is raw with the reminder that... he is often too pragmatic at times, quick to see duty and crush down his own emotions for what must be done.
It is not that he doesn't feel.
He just ... is too used to being right, sometimes.]
no subject
Should we find each other on opposing sides tomorrow, with me called as executioner...
I will ask him what he wants.
[That is... all Chiron can really do, Hansa, if fate is cruel]
no subject
[He says, his expression stern. Its easy, to go forward and put yourself in the line of fire, think sacrifice is what is needed, but...]
[Especially in a world that operates like this, where even a death can throw off the entire balance of how it works. They can't afford acts like that.]
[After a moment, he reaches out, placing a hand against Chiron's side.]
You know, I don't want to lose you too, okay?
no subject
And it is not that Chiron is unaware or naive; there is a weight to his presence that is often counted as necessary, especially among those who look for guidance.
... But Hansa isn't one of his students, and Chiron supposes maybe that is where his surprise comes from. His head tilts, eyes drawn to the weight of the hand on his side...]
I knew that you held me in high regard, but I did not think you...
[cared that deeply]
no subject
[Hansa has always been the kind to enjoy life. Whatever it offers, big, small, the thrill of a fight, the lazy times when he can sit back and watch the news, awakening to a new day and going to bed for the night. But the life of an Executor is isolating. He's a weapon, told to go off to annihilate the Church's enemies, and though he may not remember his personal connections with the Church now, hazy as they are, he remembers that his life is one he takes on his own. Even the Quartet who goes along with him are more coworkers than friends. He knows people in the Church who he's friendly with, but its hardly as if he's out there to stay with them, just spending time for time's sake.]
[But here, free from that life, held in this bubble, there are people he's grown to care for, and more than he thought possible. He still thinks about how he would've laughed, if he was told that he would, in any way, get along with a Heroic Spirit. And here...]
[He pats Chiron's side, once, but lets it stay there, like he's afraid to draw it back.]
Yeah, well, I'm a man of many surprises. [A short laugh.] I'm always happy just...talking with you, you know?
no subject
And I you, Hansa.
[They have discussed it before -- how very few people took the chance to know the centaur of legend. He had spent so many years being revered for his intellect, his ability to teach. The type of fulfilling life many would covet, even if he'd always been afraid to hurt others.
But on the occasion... lonely, in its own way.
What irony that he didn't see it until coming here to the Realm, surrounded by people who have chosen to care for him on his own merits as a person.]
... I think I am more accustomed to the role of a teacher, or a warrior. [A pause... but he will reach out and place a hand on where he hopes Hansa's shoulder to be]
But for you, I would be a friend, if possible.